October
by HappilyNo1
Summary: Mainly focuses on Gaia's thoughts. A songfic of an Evanescence song called October. Please review I want to know what you think. it's probably going to be a 1 shot fic


**October**  
  
Gaia sits on a lonely bench in the twilight of an October evening. The light, chilling wind blows leaves of trees and they softly fall to the ground. The park is empty, only a few people are braving the cool autumn evening.  
  
Lost in thought, Gaia sat staring into space, her light coat pulled tightly around her shoulders. She had always been alone and it had hurt, like when her father left, Sam was killed but somehow this was worse. She couldn't let this person go, with her father and with Sam she had no choice but this time she would make sure that the only other person she could say she loved did not and could not leave. No one would stand in her way now, she had hurt him before but she would not let Loki get to him first.  
  
**_I can't run anymore _**

**_I fall before you _**

**_Here I am I have nothing left _**

**_Though I tried to forget _**

**_You're all that I am_**  
  
Thanks to you I have a friend in this world, I'm not always alone even though you're not with me and I pushed you away. I didn't want you to feel pain the way I do, I didn't want your life in danger, you don't deserve it. You gave so much to me and I took it but I never did anything for you. I promise that will change, whatever you want done I will do. I am so grateful for the hope you gave me. I'm sorry for the times I've abused you and forced you into so many of my own problems. I'm sorry I pushed you aside when I met Mary. I'm sorry.  
  
Take me home

**_ I'm through fighting it _**

**_Broken _**

**_Lifeless I give up _**

**_You're my only strength_**

**_ Without you I can't go on _**

**_Anymore _**

**_Ever again_**  
  
Gaia got up and left the park, even though it was getting late and darkness was coming quickly she didn't want to go home yet, she wanted more time to think and be on her own. She had nowhere else to go, not anywhere she was welcome anyway or was she? She walked along the streets around another block until she reached the house. Would Loki be looking for her here? Gaia didn't care, she couldn't let him run her life which he had ruined in the first place.  
  
**_My only hope (all the times I've tried)_**

**_ My only peace (to walk away from you)_**

**_ My only joy _**

**_My only strength (I fall from your abounding grace)_**

**_ My only powe_**

**_r My only life_**

**_ (And love is all I am) My only love_**  
  
I can't change the way I feel or what I've done because I know I've hurt you. Even if you won't listen to me I want you to understand that I never meant to pass any of my pain or my suffering on to you please believe that. I think leaving New York is the best thing for me. I want to start again somewhere that I can't hurt the people who have trusted me and been there for me the whole way.  
  
**_I can't run anymore_**

**_ I give myself to you_**

**_ I'm sorry_**

**_ I'm sorry _**

**_In all my bitterness_**

**_ I ignored_**

**_ All that's real and true_**

**_ All I need is you_**  
  
Gaia saw his face at the window, she ran to the nearest shadows so that he couldn't see her. She looked longingly up at him. I can't leave you unless that's want you want. How do I ask you, can I just crawl back into your life and expect you to forgive me?  
  
When night falls on me I'll not close my eyes I'm too alive And you're too strong I can't lie anymore I fall down before you I'm sorry I'm sorry  
  
The thing is, Gaia thought, this time I really am sorry. There have been times that I've lied when I said I was sorry, when I didn't mean it. I do now, more than anything. It was truly dark now, the only light was coming from his window, his parents must be away Gaia thought. If I do this it has to be tonight.  
  
**_My only hope (all the times I've tried)_**

**_ My only peace (to walk away from you) _**

**_My only joy_**

**_ My only strength _**

**_(I fall from your abounding grace) _**

**_My only power _**

**_My only life_**

**_ (And love is all I am) My only love_**  
  
Gaia stayed, hidden in the shadows for a long time. Even though she was fearless she had decided that she wasn't brave. Where fear should kick in now she only felt a sense of dread. She wasn't sure why when she knew what he was going to say. She would go home defeated and more alone than before but she had to try. She picked up a handfull of stones from the gravel path and threw them at the window. When nothing happened she picked up another handfull and was about to throw when the window opened and the curtains were pulled back.  
  
Constantly ignoring The pain consuming me But this time it's too deep I'll never stray again  
  
He smiled. "Long time no see Moore." he called softly the wind catching his words. " I've missed you." Gaia was about to respond when his head disappeared and the window was shut. She went numb, why had he disappeared so quickly, had something got him. A few moments later the front door was pulled back.  
  
**_My only hope,  
  
(All the times I've tried)  
  
My only peace,  
  
(To walk away from you)  
  
My only joy,  
  
My only strength,  
  
(I fall into your abounding grace)  
  
My only power,  
  
My only life,  
  
(And love is where I am)  
_**  
"Ed!" she cried falling into his open arms. "I'm so sorry about everything..." "Ssh" Ed soothed. "It's okay."  
  
**_My only love,  
  
My only hope,  
  
(All the times I've tried)  
  
My only peace,  
  
(To walk away from you)  
  
My only joy,  
  
My only strength,  
  
(I fall into your abounding grace)  
  
My only power,  
  
My only life,  
  
(And love is where I am)  
  
My only love. _**


End file.
